It has been confirmed that I will be arriving in the Falls of Idaho on December 23 at 5 pm and will be there until the 26th at 5 pm. This means we must gather together on the evening of the 23rd and have an enjoyable time, possibly hit up Ray's (the restaurant, not Ray Tapp, Mark), maybe even some seltzer sletcher?

I expect to see all of you on this evening since I haven't seen most of you in over a year (a fact nearly as disturbing as seeing a picture of feces in the Perkins menu).

Adventures in Ward Prayer

Every Sunday night my singles ward meets for "Ward Prayer," a spiritual thought and prayer and an excuse to get together.

Since it is freezing cold as of late, people pour out of their apartments just before 9 pm to avoid being in the sub-balmy temperature for too long.

This creates an extremely predictable audience and target for the rucus of Devonshire 15 aka "the ranch" (our apartment).

A week ago the ward congregated on the small expanse of grass that covers the edge of the parking garage. It slopes steepily away from the side of the building and is only about 12 feet wide.

Mr. Premont and I got up to make an anouncement from "the ranch" with my mega phone. I told the ward that on behalf of "the ranch" we would like to wish the ward a happy fall. At that moment, 7 large trash bags full of leaves were launched from the 6 windows above the crowd, literally burying the people sitting along the edge of the wall. A 300-pound friend of ours tried to jump up and escape, but due to the high density of leaves already on the ground and the steep grade, he flipped onto his but and slid down the hill, taking out several people in his path.

ONE WEEK LATER:

They moved ward prayer into the parking garage because they think it is warmer. The Elder's Quorum President was making an announcement in the middle of the ward, which had made a circle around him. The metal grate covering the sewer beneath his foot bumped upward and he jumped back startled. The grate launched off and to the side, a pizza box flew out of the hole, and then I climbed out in my Ninja turtle mascott costume. Mr. Premont said that many of the people screamed in terror and then proceded to laugh for 5 minutes straight. The ninja turtle walked away.

Miss you kids,

Dusty

Good news for Scott Fuller

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/ford_unveils_new_car_for_cash

gifts for jason

dear jason.

i found the perfect clock for you. enjoy.

http://www.geekologie.com/2009/11/the_colorblind_clock_is_a_litt.php

Death Doc

Hey team, I will be in Idaho Falls tonight (Wednesday) at 1 AM through Friday morning. We are filming a documentary about the professions revolving around death and will be shooting all day Thursday at the Wood Funeral home in IF. There are a couple spots when we may need some extras so if you are around let me know, I'd love to see your smiling faces.

XOXO

Dusty

Did you know? ...

So did you guys know that I own this? www.iriderexburg.com For real. I own a 24 passenger minibus.

moscow

friends, as most of you know, i am in moscow (not russia) idaho. for the past few weeks i've been eyeing a pair of 'road closed' signs laying abandoned on the side of an old road. last friday night i decided to do something about that. since all of my friends were too waisted to bring with i had to solo-op this mission. around midnight-midnight thirty i found myself carrying these signs a mile and a half or so throughout neighborhoods doin my best to avoid detection from the police. after some deal of time i eventually arrived at my intended drop zone... consisting of a divided street on an upward curved hill. i deployed a sign and sat back in bushes to watch. sure enough, cars soon came and sure enough, they were confused out of their mind. before i knew it i had a mini traffic jam at 1am. because of the largness of the divide people couldn't get around and eventually had to back out a long long way. some people were smart and just moved the sign... .. but they soon proved wern't that smart because they moved it back into place after they got past. one of which person who obviously felt accomplished for getting around the sign boasted 'thats how we do it where i'm from' and proceeded to get back in his minivan. at one time, a late night runner saw through the plot however and felt the need to move the sign out of the road... not to worry for a couple of drunk students soon walked by and upon seeing the sign thought it would be funny to put the sign in the road. as chance would have it they ended up placing the sign at the exact time a car was turning up the road and got caught. in confusion they pushed the sign to the side and scrambled. jokes on them. before i left for the night i moved the sign back onto the road and proceeded home. as of now the sign has been moved off to the side of the road but i do not doubt that many others fell victim to the trap. that is all.

Bumbershoot

I am headed to Bumbershoot with some Provoites this coming weekend in Seattle. Huge music fest and lots to do and see. You should all go. Mark, That's kind of sort of your neck of the woods? Hope you are all well,health-filled, and happy.

August 18-20

Hey cool guys,

I texted you the other day, but realized that some of you may not get texts. To recap, August 18-20 I am not working and so you and your spouses are cordially invited to boogy-down in Jackson during those days.

I have a white-water raft and my roomate has a kyak and a two-man duckie. That means we can run Alpine Canyon. We also recently borrowed some paddle boards (huge surf board with long paddle commonly used in the ocean) from a rental shop where a friend works and took those down the scenic stretch of the river. Pretty awesome. Mountain biking, inner-tubing, climbing, huckleberry picking, etc. It's all up for grabs.

Let me know if you would like to come play, you are all welcome to crash at mine and sven's place.

XOXOXOHICKIEXOXO

Dusty

The night we risk it all

Fellow poops and/or others who read this. The time has come for world domination. I call upon those near and far on Saturday, the 15th of August (maybe the 14th depending on who's where) to gather together in Idaho Falls, to stand as equals, and fight with the strength of lions in a no-mercy conquest for utter domintion in an all consuming game of risk. .. .. .. who is with me?